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    Originally posted by da.bell View Post
    That would be okay but again, not sure of the agreement that you had with her Dom. However, she does need some miscellaneous spending cash from time to time. Just make sure you haven't cut her off completely. That might make live a little harder for both of you.
    oh no, she gets to keep 30% of her tips and the checks I'm just going to record to make sure she can still pay her part of the bills. Plus I'll give her money from my share for food and what not. I think it's a pretty sweet deal still for her. The % will vary if her checks are not big enough to pay the bills and what not, but based on what I make on the side vs hrs worked she should still end up with 5-700 a month to play with and that's if it's a slow month. I think that's pretty sweet.
    Originally posted by G-MONEY
    It hurts me to say it but go OU but only for this weekend!!!!

    Comment


      Originally posted by Domsz06 View Post
      already had it, and she knows it. Otherwise she gets a one way ticket to H-town
      I wouldn't mind the one way ticket to H-town if you want to give me one. I have to go visit my mother anyways.

      I hear you. Approaching her sounds like you have been tactful enough.

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        I'm not trying to control her, but it's the only way she learns. She has had everything given to her, i mean her parents are still paying her school she choose not to pay so she can acctually graduate. I mean she asks for money for x-mas and she goes out and buys shrimp and steaks to cook. and barely has enough to pay her car and insurance. I was like HELLO we eat cheap, until we have money. she was doing well when I gave her 20 dollars a week for food, but that went to crap after her mom gave her money. She had found some GREAT deals for dinner it was great I thought she was learning, but then nope.
        Originally posted by G-MONEY
        It hurts me to say it but go OU but only for this weekend!!!!

        Comment


          She can relearn those. Just be supportive in other ways of thinking and I am sure things will work out for the best.

          Comment


            yup she just has to want to is the key.
            Originally posted by G-MONEY
            It hurts me to say it but go OU but only for this weekend!!!!

            Comment


              Originally posted by G-MONEY View Post
              It's because they don't have cool screen names
              like mine is.....
              It's not an optical illusion.
              It just looks like one.....

              Comment


                And that is the hardest part.

                Last week, I took some clothes over to my ex-wife's house to drop off when she wasn't there only to find out that she had a Final Notice on her door saying that she would be evicted. Unfortunately, she has always lived above her means and attempts to get away with everything if possible. I didn't try to change her while we were married but knowing what I know today, I would have filed for bankruptcy already. Whew, I missed out on that one.

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                  I'm not gonna lie, I got use to a real nice lifestyle in ok, due to my job and living status. I have not been able to change that out here, hence I work two jobs.

                  well she is the same way, she has learned to adapt a bit, but it's also hard now cuz she is on meds for bi-polar and depression and they are not working as well since she is really unhappy here. I have to walk a thin line, and sometimes I don't help like I should. But I have to be happy too so it's just a mess, just a mess, but I got myself into it, and I'll get out, just a matter of who's happy when I get out.
                  Originally posted by G-MONEY
                  It hurts me to say it but go OU but only for this weekend!!!!

                  Comment


                    Med's can always be a problem when they are not taken, the proper dose has not been assessed, or the med's are not working at all. I have dealt with issues from my ex and current GF with med's and believe me, once the med's are set, life is a lot easier. However, maybe Bako is not the place for her. But again, that is also another reason I didn't go back to Bako.

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                      I have not discussed it here much, but I feel very fortunate to have been given the opportunity to get out of my marriage, when it happened, and with no kids and no strings attached.

                      She has her life, and I have mine, but the two are very different, and I for one am much happier knowing where I am today is not where I would be had we stayed together.

                      Things are happening in my life now that make that time seem just a bad brief dream... Things are SO much better now!!!!!
                      It's not an optical illusion.
                      It just looks like one.....

                      Comment


                        Originally posted by philwsailz View Post
                        I have not discussed it here much, but I feel very fortunate to have been given the opportunity to get out of my marriage, when it happened, and with no kids and no strings attached.

                        She has her life, and I have mine, but the two are very different, and I for one am much happier knowing where I am today is not where I would be had we stayed together.

                        Things are happening in my life now that make that time seem just a bad brief dream... Things are SO much better now!!!!!


                        I was not happy in my previous marriage but I am happy with the person I am with now I guess I was just tired of doing all the housework while the ex-wife sat on her arse all day at home watching the children.

                        Comment


                          Originally posted by da.bell View Post
                          Med's can always be a problem when they are not taken, the proper dose has not been assessed, or the med's are not working at all. I have dealt with issues from my ex and current GF with med's and believe me, once the med's are set, life is a lot easier. However, maybe Bako is not the place for her. But again, that is also another reason I didn't go back to Bako.
                          yes I so agree. that's a point I made to her. I move every 1-3 yrs, and the places that I'll be moving to in my first 10 yrs are not much better then Bako. So that was a question I asked her, if you can't be happy here how are you going to be happy in Billings, or New mexico? She takes her meds, but when she is even more depressed I think the dosage is not now correct.

                          Originally posted by philwsailz View Post
                          I have not discussed it here much, but I feel very fortunate to have been given the opportunity to get out of my marriage, when it happened, and with no kids and no strings attached.

                          She has her life, and I have mine, but the two are very different, and I for one am much happier knowing where I am today is not where I would be had we stayed together.

                          Things are happening in my life now that make that time seem just a bad brief dream... Things are SO much better now!!!!!
                          I realized how different we are when I moved out alone and not with her. I wasn't happy, but I became happy. Now it's worse since I work harder for less. so it's just a visious cycle. Guess I could just man up and sell my toys and just see what it's like to live in a true lifestyle that i should live in, instead of one I want to live in.
                          Originally posted by G-MONEY
                          It hurts me to say it but go OU but only for this weekend!!!!

                          Comment


                            Originally posted by da.bell View Post


                            I was not happy in my previous marriage but I am happy with the person I am with now I guess I was just tired of doing all the housework while the ex-wife sat on her arse all day at home watching the children.

                            I was getting ready to share all of the rotten things that my ex did, but she could probably dish out on me as well, so suffice it to say, we were not meant to be, and I think we are both happier for it. How about I be the big guy and leave it at that? It turned really rotten. Looking back, I have to say I was poisoned. Not literally poisoned, but it was a very sick situation.
                            It's not an optical illusion.
                            It just looks like one.....

                            Comment


                              Have her go into the doctor and talk with them regarding the drugs. My ex-father-in-law (who I still have great contact with) is a pharmacist. He has taught me a lot about the types of medications out there regarding the same issues she has Dom. But, she needs to make the first step and tell the dr that they med's are not working. Better to do this before full depression hits because afterwards, it's harder because they get use to the idea of being depressed and when the right med's are introduced, she will counter them by not taking them since she feels better without them in her system. Please get her to the dr.... Please.

                              Comment


                                Originally posted by philwsailz View Post
                                I was getting ready to share all of the rotten things that my ex did, but she could probably dish out on me as well, so suffice it to say, we were not meant to be, and I think we are both happier for it. How about I be the big guy and leave it at that? It turned really rotten. Looking back, I have to say I was poisoned. Not literally poisoned, but it was a very sick situation.
                                I hear you... I have a terribly sour taste in my mouth because of my ex-wife. The problem is: I feel sorry for my children and the conditions that they live in at her house. Believe me, a landfill is probably cleaner than her house and the Child Protective Services Department is fully aware of this. However, it isn't me calling them. The courts don't like it when the other parent tries to tell the truth but they feel that you are just trying to spite her. I just gave up and now others are turning her into CPS. Will only prove my point in court someday soon and I am off the hook.

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